i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize
