I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Shame - the story of my life.
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