This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize