oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
My life is pants optional.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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