It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
