Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
