He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I currently don't understand fingers.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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