we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Everything about him screamed your future.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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