her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
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