I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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