erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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