you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
