We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
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