I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
