I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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