Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
BRING THE BAGELS
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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