Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
