Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
