Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
She is in my trunk
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
