Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize