It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
