How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
