no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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