North Korea, Best Korea!
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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