Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
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