Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
