Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
