three words: i give head
three words: not that well
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize