I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize