Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
