I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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