just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
