my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
