I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize