Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
"it" just moved
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
