I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
