I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
