Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
