i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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