Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
