Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
