And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
