My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
only if we run a train.
done.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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