I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
