And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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