On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
