Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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