We're like a lot better than the average bears
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Randomize
