yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
