we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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