I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
